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Scientists are testing whether MDMA can cure tinnitus

The cure for tinnitus? Simple: take some MDMA to accomodate the hearing loss you gained from too many nights taking MDMA.

Tinnitus is commonly referred to as ‘ringing in the ears’, the high-pitched, consistent squeal that you will hear after concerts, car accidents, or any other form of sound loud enough to be traumatic to your hearing.

Currently, there is no available cure for this affliction, with researchers all over the world consistently searching for one. A group of drug-savvy scientists over in New Zealand think they have found a potential remedy though, in the use of your good mate MDMA.

tinnitus

If this proves to be an effective cure, I’m imaging the timeline for a few tinnitus sufferers I’ve come into contact with:

Take MDMA > suffer from tinnitus in the morning > repeat the last three steps for far too long > eventually your tinnitus becomes unbearable and seek treatment > take MDMA.

It will be interesting to see how this plays out, to say the least. Could this be one of the great self-fulfilling prophecies of our time?

Regardless, you now have another excuse to take MDMA. You’re welcome.

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