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Why more men shouldn’t be afraid of sex toys

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Photo: Lovehoney

Despite the side eyes you may get while talking about them, sex toys for men aren’t as taboo as you’d think. Here’s why you should take the plunge.

If you thought sex toys were all vibrators and dildos, think again! There’s a wide variety of sex toys designed for men, taking sexual satisfaction and masturbation to explosive new heights. Suppliers such as sexual happiness brand Lovehoney are absolutely rife with cock rings, male masturbators, and other toys you’ve likely never dreamed of.

If you’re still a little sceptical or unsure where to begin, that’s absolutely fine – you’re definitely not alone. To help combat preconceived notions of sex toys and improve your time in the bedroom, we’re gently covering the realm of male sex toys and why you shouldn’t be afraid. If you’re already well-versed in male sex toys (or toys deisgned for people with a peen), fantastic, but if not, let’s begin.

Stigma vs Science

Up until now, we’re sure that the trusty left hand has served valiantly. However, why not utilise recent scientific and technological advancements to enhance your experience? We’re not living in the stone age anymore, and options are plentiful.

These carefully designed pleasure-inducers also hold the potential to improve your sex life significantly, something old methods can’t match.

According to sex toy experts, Lovehoney, male sex toys like the stroker can “help you train yourself to last longer in bed”. Cock rings grant the potential for increased “erection strength and stamina”. And finally, prostate massagers open up the door to “brand new sensations”. Not bad at all.

Male Masturbators (Strokers)

Lovehoney Ambassador Cam Fraser, certified sex coach and tantric yoga instructor, has made a career out of helping men achieve better relationships with their bodies and their partners through sexual teaching. He kindly shared some advice for those who are ready to start their journey with a little self-experimentation:

“If you’re unfamiliar with male sex toys, a safe and fun place to start is with something small and simple. For example, you may like to try using a cock ring or a mini male masturbator. These toys are noninvasive, nonthreatening, inexpensive and really enjoyable to play around with. If your curiosity is piqued by these, you may also like to try a textured stroker.”

Stroker sleeves (sometimes called male masturbators) are a perfect springboard to male sex toys. The stroker sleeve stimulates the entire length of the penis with its unique grooves and textures, significantly amping up foreplay or solo missions. They’re also straightforward to clean – just run the sleeve under warm water after use.

Also, before you let loose, water-based lubricant is an absolute must if you want to avoid friction burn. And we’re assuming you do!

If a stroker sounds like your cup of tea, definitely give a Fleshlight a try. They’re the most popular male masturbation tool of them all.

Image: Tenga

Prostate Massagers

For gay men, this won’t be a surprise, but if you’re straight and a stranger to anal play, it’s time to expose you to a crucial truth. Your prostate is a critical erogenous zone and can lead to intense, full-body orgasms. Moreover, some men can climax solely from prostate massaging.

If this is your first encounter with butt-stuff, here’s a quick guide. Once the massager is in place (take it slowly), gently move the toy around in a circular motion, using your finger as a pad.

If inserting the massager feels like too much, you can start with a finger. Holding it up there will relax your sphincter muscles and get you comfortable and prepared for the toy. And, most importantly, remember the anus doesn’t self lubricate so don’t forget a big old dollop of lube!

Once you’ve started, it’s time to find that sweet spot. People much wiser than I say it’s about three inches inside your rectum, on the upper side, but your opinion is the one that counts! Everyone’s got a different trigger. Safe to say, you’ll know when you find it.

Cock Rings

Cock rings are a versatile sex toy that pairs with a penis pump or works great on its own. Available in a wide variety of materials, sizes and shapes, cock rings will keep your penis firm and potentially increase stamina, which makes for incredible, longer-lasting sex for both parties.

But cock rings aren’t always just about the penis – couple’s cock rings can include accessories such as rabbit ears for clitoral stimulation, meaning shared pleasure for you and your partner.

Slip the ring onto the base of your penis, and let it do the rest of the work.

Advice to finish on

If you’re still looking at this list with a raised eyebrow and a hesitancy to give any of these toys a go, that’s perfectly normal too. Sex is not a race, and neither is the journey to becoming a toy sexpert.

Take another piece of advice from our friend Cam:

“Again, the safest and funnest way to explore sex toy use is by easing yourself into it with something easy-to-use and not intimidating. If you’re still unsure about using a sex toy, you can even start by just adding lube to your self-pleasuring. This simple addition can totally change the way you masturbate and open the door for you to experience new sensations.”

When treated with respect, the acts of sex and self-gratification are vast and rewarding. However, if sex becomes mundane (and this can happen for many reasons), toys are a perfect means to switch things up and keep your bedroom antics interesting. In addition, when using sex toys, you’ll learn more about your body and often your partner’s body as well, leading to healthier, more stimuating sex.

The stigma surrounding male sex toys is a relic of the past, so why not benefit from the inventions and spark your curiosities? There’s something out there for everyone.