Poor Ian Thorpe. After rising to international sporting stardom as a teenager, he inevitably hit a level of success from which there was only one direction out: downhill. After battling hoards of busybodies who insisted he was gay, to which he replied “I’m not”, Thorpey got sick of living life in the limelight.
Earlier this year, he was admitted to rehab in order to seek help for his depression and issues with alcohol. So, it is only fitting that we have decided to give the Thorpedo the love and attention he deserves. He’s as Australian as a sheep shearing station, Bunnings Warehouse, or this image. We love him. You know who else we love? The Stiffys. And The Stiffys love Thorpe. Smell that sweetness in the air? It’s the scent of love, and it is all around.
Ian Thorpe gets some lovin’ rap action from bad boys The Stiffys (ladies love them), exclusively for Happy. Cheers boys.
The Stiffys are our new mates from Melbourne. They only communicate in CAPS LOCK, they love Passion Pop and they know how to rap. This article may feel like its going nowhere, but bare with me. Do you know what you get when you combine the friendship of Happy and The Stiffys with the legend that is Ian Thorpe? You get this here video: Inspired by the man with the big feet, it was written and recorded by The Stiffys exclusively for Happy.
If you like what you see (and how could you not), be sure to hang with The Stiffys more. These dedicated men soldiered through a stolen laptop incident (which saw them lose their personal stash of the complete Dawson’s Creek collection) to bring us this vid. Ask yourselves, what can they do for you?
See them in all their glory on:
Saturday 5 July
PIGSTY IN JULY: w/ WOLF & CUB AND KING OF THE NORTH, Dashville in Belford, New South Wales
Saturday 12 July
TAGO MAGO, Thornbury, Victoria, Australia
Friday 18 July
THE ROLLER DEN: w/GAY PARIS, Sydney, Australia
Saturday 19 July
EL TOPO, Bondi Junction
Friday 8 August
THE NORTHERN, Byron Bay
Saturday 9 August
PUNKFEST PRESENTS EKKA WREKKA, Prince of Wales Hotel in Brisbane, Queensland, Australia
FIND OUT MORE ON
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