Welcome to the thoroughly cursed world of Kanye West. In today’s instalment, the American artist sat down with his best friends Forbes to discuss the impending doom that could be Kanye 2020. He used the interview to air his deeply conservative views on vaccinations and abortion, as well as to bash fellow Presidential candidates Biden and Trump.
“Like anything I’ve ever done in my life, I’m [going] to win,” West quoted. The 503 awards that he has been nominated for, and lost, may beg to differ.
In the last 24 hours, Kanye West has spread anti-vaccine and pro-life views, detailed his political goals, relinquished his support of the Trump administration, and *checks notes* dropped that he probably had coronavirus at one point.
First thing’s first, the tea about the Presidential campaign. If the current election didn’t involve Trump, West notes that he would have happily run as a Republican. In such circumstances, he has opted for an independent banner, lovingly dubbed the Birthday Party. Armed with the slogan “YES” and the mantra “when we win, it’s everybody’s birthday,” Kanye and his team of advisors announce that they are ready to take on the polls.
Who are his advisors you ask? That would be his wife Kim Kardashian-West, Tesla founder Elon Musk, and his running mate, Biblical life coach, and Wyoming preacher Michelle Tidball.
Turns out that West hasn’t actually filed any of the necessary paperwork to enter the November elections, plus he has missed a couple of key deadlines. Nonetheless, he still seems adamant in his mission.
Things then go from bad to fully cooked as West jumps into the field of healthcare. Referring to vaccines as “the mark of the beast,” the rapper claims that “they want to put chips inside of us, they want to do all kinds of things, to make it where we can’t cross the gates of heaven.” He then capped off the spiel with this gem: “Planned Parenthoods have been placed inside cities by white supremacists to do the Devil’s work. [I am] pro-life because I’m following the word of the bible.” Disgusted sighs can be heard everywhere.
West wrapped this whole fiasco up by claiming that he suffered “chills, shaking in the bed, taking hot showers” back in February, so therefore had COVID-19. Oh, forgot to mention, he also reckons that the pandemic will cure itself, so long as we “pray for the freedom” and “stop doing things that make God mad.” What a ride.
Check out the full interview here.