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DJ Goodboy takes us to flavourtown

dj goodboy lachlan wyllie happy mag

Every blue moon you come across a DJ so dank, it feels like they’ve reinvented the wheel. Since he started showing up around the Sydney disc jockey circuit, DJ Goodboy has remained behind a thin veil of Guy Fieri-shaped anonymity… but we knew we had to track him down.

After a series of bribes, shady dealings and the hospitalisation of a staff member, we managed to secure this mysterious hit slinger an interview.

Speaking to him was an intimidating affair to say the least.

dj goodboy lachlan wyllie happy mag

Zesty and flavoursome, DJ Goodboy knows the anatomy of a hit better than an American restauranteur knows the anatomy of a pancake stack.

HAPPY: What’s it all about?

DJ GOODBOY: Thanks for the question, Tom. The message behind DJ Goodboy can be conveyed in three simple, evocative and, most importantly, simple images:

  1. The Moon Landing. Like all good DJs, I too was faked on a sound stage in Arizona.
  2. That video of John Howard, you know when he tried bowling a cricket ball in Pakistan and completely fucked it? Yeah, that one.
  3. Fidget Spinners. If you’re not with me on this one, you’re against me.

HAPPY: Why ‘Goodboy’?

DJ GOODBOY: I came up with the name on the night of a gig, DJing for my homeboi Bilby. When prompted on by someone on Facebook what my DJ name is, I chose DJ Goodboy “because I’m a good boy”. The rest is history.

HAPPY: What’s the last thing you saw that was so beautiful, it made you cry?

DJ GOODBOY: 

HAPPY: Is there anything you wouldn’t do for love?

DJ GOODBOY: Listen to Meatloaf (though I would drop the entirety of his album Bat Out of Hell during a set just to see how long before I get bottled).

HAPPY: What’s your number?

DJ GOODBOY: Thanks for the question, Tom. My number is 0435 553 152. If you’re reading this and happen to be either a) my dad, b) Shrek, or c) a hot single in my area, then, yknow… hit me up. Ya boi DJ Goodboy does not disappoint! (Unless you’re my dad, who can and will openly admit to me being a disappointment).

HAPPY: Thanks, sent a pic. Tell the people what you see.

DJ GOODBOY: Honestly, I’m not sure what I’m looking at but I’m in a holding cell at Redfern Station because of it now and the bond is $1400. You better bail me out, Tom.

HAPPY: When did you realise you had hit the bigtime?

DJ GOODBOY: When U.S President Donald Trump defended his son Donald Trump Jr, saying ‘he’s a good boy’. It’s clear in this line that he was making a sly reference to yours truly, and that’s some serious brand recognition! He basically subtweeted me IRL… that’s when I knew.

HAPPY: What’s the key ingredient in a successful, food-centric reality program?

DJ GOODBOY: Thanks for the question, Tom. The key ingredient? Easy. A veritable beast of a man eating greasy food at breakneck speed with little-to-no grace. All my food network heroes have at least three chins, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

HAPPY: What’s the fastest you’ve eaten a hot dog in front of a crowd?

DJ GOODBOY: 0.5 seconds. I couldn’t breathe probably for weeks. It goes without saying… I would do it again in a heartbeat.

HAPPY: Just how do you fucking do it?

DJ GOODBOY: Thanks for the question, Tom. Everyone needs someone to look up to, for inspiration, for support, for creative and motivational sustenance. I’m fortunate to have that in three-time Primetime Emmy Award nominee Guy Fieri – the guy is my rock. Every time I feel down I just remember that one day, we’ll all be ascending to that great, big flavourtown in the sky.

HAPPY: When are you going to get frosted tips, Mr. Goodboy?

DJ GOODBOY: The moment Justin Timberlake responds to my texts and agrees to get frosties too. I know you’re reading this, JT. We had a pact. WE HAD A PACT!

HAPPY: You have one track to empty the club as fast as possible. What do you drop?

DJ GOODBOY: Every time, without fail:

HAPPY: Meaning of life. Go.

DJ GOODBOY: Memes.

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July 25, 2017