French government confirms that cocaine does not cure coronavirus

If you’re not already affected by coronavirus, you’re sick of hearing about it. We know.

Yet to add fuel to the frenzy, a new conspiracy has spread across the world wide web in the past few days, and it’s rather specific.

Cocaine does not cure coronavirusIn the latest fake news, trolls have informed that cocaine will kill coronavirus. The French government has come to the rescue to confirm that, unsurprisingly, it won’t.

Back in January, an image was posted to Facebook by an online news generator with a news banner titled, “Cocaine kills coronavirus” and “Scientists is shocked to discover that this drug can fight the virus.” Facebook flagged it as false information and the image was found to be a product of the website Break Your Own News.

Yet incredibly, it seems recently the Ministry of Social Affairs and Health in Paris felt the need to post on Twitter to ensure French citizens that cocaine does not sanitize the insides of the nose. C’est tres gentil.

“No, cocaine does NOT protect against COVID-19,” said an official in a Twitter statement. “It is an addictive drug that causes serious side effects and is harmful to people’s health.”

In other news, on the Jim Bakker Show, the so-called “televangelists” have begun selling coronavirus treatments in blue and silver bottles. For the reasonable price of USD$125, you can get your grubby mits on Silver Solution, a product that will eliminate coronavirus bacteria within 12 hours!

Sound too good to be true? It is. That is the entire basis of infomercials.

Thank you for attending marketing 101. Quarantine your panic, please.