Clocked

Escaped convict kicks policeman in the groin while out to buy ‘Call of Duty’

The new Call of Duty game might be pretty good, but it’s definitely not ‘kick a cop in the groin’ good.

Clint Butler, 36, has unfortunately made headlines after being recaptured by West Midlands police whilst trying to purchase the new Call of Duty title. Butler had been serving a 17-year sentence over firearms and robbery offences.

Butler’s sentence was set to finish in 2024. However, he decided he’d rather have a change of scenery and absconded HMP Spring Hill on the 28th of November.

Call of Duty

Butler must have found it relatively easy to lay low with the normalisation of face coverings in public places as well as the current lockdown in the UK. All Butler needed to do was remain at home and not break the law.

But screw that – the allure of a new Call of Duty game had enchanted him, and there was nothing that would come in between him and the best CoD zombies experience to date.

So Butler exited hiding for a cheeky bit of non-essential travel and headed to the nearest high street. While perusing the area’s shops, he noticed two police officers and quickly diverted course away from them.

Unfortunately for him, the two officers noticed his suspicious behaviour and approached him.  They began by asking him for the reason of their travel. Butler responded by telling them he’d “come to get the new Call of Duty because I can’t sit around in lockdown.”

A fair enough response, however, the officers weren’t on board. Unfortunately, the reasons given did not satisfy the requirements for travel and this was a breach of lockdown. This, coupled with some already suspicious behaviour, made officers want to run the assailant’s details.

Butler forgot to put points into his charm attributes and was unable to smooth talk his way out of his predicament (one of the downsides of going a pure strength build). Plan B, he thought.

Man gets stopped by police for being outside during lockdown, responds with a kick to the groin. from ActualPublicFreakouts

He recoiled his leg and launched it squarely into the officer’s groin. As he made contact, he spun around to sprint to safety, but his black Air Max 90s were unable to maintain traction. He slipped and fell over.

The officers were quick to apprehend him. He is now back in jail and facing an extra 19 months for his shenanigans. Butler is set for release in 2025, which is roughly four Call of Duty games away.

If only he just downloaded it.