Duchess of Sussex Meghan Markle has spoken publicly about the stigma surrounding miscarriage in a heartfelt article.
In an opinion piece published to the New York Times, Meghan Markle revealed that she experienced a miscarriage back in July.
Markle wrote of the heartbreak and loss that she and husband Prince Harry experienced, saying that tragedy occurred while she was looking after her 18-month-old son. “I knew, as I clutched my firstborn child, that I was losing my second,” Meghan wrote.
In her article titled The Losses We Share, the former actress wrote that she was sharing her story to help break the stigma and silence around a common tragedy. “Losing a child means carrying an almost unbearable grief, experienced by many but talked about by few,” she wrote. “In the pain of our loss, my husband and I discovered that in a room of 100 women, 10 to 20 of them will have suffered from miscarriage.”
Markle wrote that, despite miscarriage being a widely shared experience, the silence around the subject has been perpetuated shame and isolation. “Yet despite the staggering commonality of this pain, the conversation remains taboo, riddled with (unwarranted) shame, and perpetuating a cycle of solitary mourning,” Markle wrote. She described the tragedy in detail, explaining how it struck on an “ordinary” day.
“A morning that began as ordinarily as any other day: Make breakfast. Feed the dogs. Take vitamins. Find that missing sock. Pick up the rogue crayon that rolled under the table. Throw my hair in a ponytail before getting my son from his crib. After changing his diaper, I felt a sharp cramp.”
….this is really beautiful . .and oh, so needed . .
— Susan Thompson (@SLT229) November 25, 2020
“I dropped to the floor with him in my arms, humming a lullaby to keep us both calm, the cheerful tune a stark contrast to my sense that something was not right.”
Markle describes the pain and agony of that day so clearly, writing that: “lay[ing] in a hospital bed, holding my husband’s hand. I felt the clamminess of his palm and kissed his knuckles, wet from both our tears. Staring at the cold white walls, my eyes glazed over. I tried to imagine how we’d heal.”
According to SANDS, the loss of an unborn child can result in PTSD, grief, and trauma for parents and families. It is estimated that 286 women a day suffer miscarriages in Australia, which is a shocking statistic considering that the subject is not widely discussed.
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle made a decision to talk about their experience. We “discovered that in a room of 100 women, 10 to 20 of them will have suffered from miscarriage,” Meghan writes. https://t.co/xCJbgPgufq pic.twitter.com/D5PpfRMjxC
— New York Times Opinion (@nytopinion) November 25, 2020
In response to Markle’s article, Buckingham Palace said that they would not be commenting on the “deeply personal matter.”
If you need support through a miscarriage or stillbirth you can call 1800 882 436 or use these resources:
SANDS: Miscarriage, Stillbirth & Newborn Death Support