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No more pissing in the park: Camperdown Park is finally getting public toilets

At long long last, Inner West Council has announced that it will install public toilets at Camperdown Memorial Rest Park.

No need to pop a squat against some poor sod’s back fence in a quiet-but-probably-not-quiet-enough Newtown alleyway. Toilets are coming soon!

In late 2018, the council conducted a survey and discovered that a whopping 76% of respondents supported the proposed location for public toilets within Camperdown Park.

Camperdown Park toilets map
Map of proposed toilet location. Image courtesy: Inner West Council.

After community consultation, the council unveiled a plan to reduce anti-social behaviour at the park. In line with the spread of inner-west gentrification and noise complaint narcs citywide, this plan included making the park an alcohol-free zone between 9 PM and 9 AM (boo). However, it also involved the construction of public toilets (yay).

Since then, god knows what has happened. Somehow it has taken the council almost four years to start building these blessed excrement removers but finally, the council have announced that the expected completion date is July this year – just in time for those messy winter picnic hangs over bottles of red.

Last year, one inner-west portaloo company, Bums On Seats Sydney, attempted to set up portaloos in Campo Park and charge users $3 a pop or $5 for unlimited daily access.

The effort was a bust (pun totally intended) because Newtown’s bushes and alleyways offer free unlimited daily access anyway. This is what happens when you leave what should be a public matter to the private sector. Thankfully, Twitter absolutely roasted the plan and it never seemed to come to fruition.

Previously, park-goers have infamously used Newtown’s plentiful crooks and crannies to relieve themselves, treating the suburb as an extensive repository for beer-fuelled public urination. Either that or they have run into the Courty or Carlisle Hotel.

According to the National Public Toilet Map – yes this map actually exists – the closest public toilets are at Newtown Library and Newtown Station. But neither are open late at night.

For those out there with young kids, who may be hesitant to bring their children into a pub, the news is surely a relief.

And hey, we aren’t complaining either. It certainly beats members of the public shaking their heads at you because you’re pissing in the gutter in daylight. The judgement!