​ ​
happy mag subscription

Which Fingermae bandmember are you?

Forget Myers-Briggs and Rorschach! The hottest question on every employer and psychiatrist’s lips this summer is how will you Fingermae?

Take the test and find out! Grab a paper and pen and write down the letter for each answer and soon you’ll know if you play an instrument that will help you pick up, or bass.

It’s the question on everyone’s lips… ‘How will you Fingermae?‘ Well, now it’s time for you to find out! Take this new quiz and uncover which bandmember you are.

1. We know your cat is the best cat, but what’s their name?

A. Minnie
B. Shoelace
C. Morgan

2. Who are you most influenced by?

A. L7 and Patti Smith
B. Midnight Oil and Boobs
C. Frank Zappa and Paul Simon

3. Time for a Mic check, what’s your go to phrase?

A. “One, two, poo in my shoe”
B. Hey you know how I have a Polish friend? I have a Czech one too. A Czech one…too.”
C. “Yeah, huh, yeah, ok I’m going to be really loud are you ready? ….(shouting) Hiyeeeargh.”

4. The band has been offered a gig, how do you check your availability?

A. See what the dogs are doing that night
B. Laugh at the thought of using a google calendar and track down my various hand written date memos.
C. Check google calendar, because it’s awesome.

6. Oh No! The rehearsal room door has malfunctioned & you’re trapped inside alone! What do you do?

A. Call for help, it’s not a faraday cage.
B. Fashion an EMP device out of a broken guitar string, can of red bull, 9V battery and some pocket change to disable the electromagnet on the door.
C. Take this moment to play the drums because you’re sure you’d be really good at them but you can’t play whilC. while anyone watches. Give up after 2 minutes, choose which bin will be the pee bucket

7. You’re going out tonight but your black jeans and black shirt haven’t dried in time, what do you do?

A. Cancel plans, stay home
B. Fashion a clothes drying device out of random cutlery, broken drumsticks and a flighty ginger cat. Be late because you couldn’t catch the heating element for 20 minutes.
C. Wear a dress and have patience when people express their surprise at this choice

8. What would you name your car?

A. Sonya
B. The Batmobile
C. Helena Bucke

9. What do you like to do for exercise?

A. Interval training
B. Runnning
C. Recite the appropriate latin verse until the Demon is gone

10. So Fingermae isn’t your only gig, how long have you played in Bandintexas?

A. About 5 years, maybe a little more
B Less than 5 years but more than three
C. Less than 6 months

11. Which of the bands you play in do you like better?

A. Bandintexas
B. Lady Sings It Better
C. Bandintexas

Now tally up your scores..

If you got mostly A’s you are: Jackie!

You are the backbone of the band, the one who remembers to write down the setlists and keeps charts of the songs. You have a strange fascination with ABBA, and poo in shoes. The poo thing was there before you adopted greyhounds.

If you got mostly C’s you are: Sally!

You are the cunt of the band, the one who provides charts in your own non-standard shorthand and changes the form of the songs as the band is trying to pick it up. You don’t practice enough but the others haven’t fired you because you book the gigs.

If you got mostly B’s you are: Lauren!

You are the heart of the band, the one who will always be ready to do a “badoom-tish” roll after a shitty joke and you have the best hair in the band. If you hadn’t made it as a drummer you probably could have made it as a mechanical engineering circus therapist.

Fingermae’s new single My Cat Is The Best Cat is available now. Listen above.


Leave a Reply

September 12, 2019