What do you get when you cross Rage Against the Machine with arguably the most overplayed song of the 70s? Not a very good time.
In this YouTube mashup that shouldn’t exist, but does, the Bee Gees meets Rage Against the Machine and the moral of the story is that sometimes, the internet is too powerful.
Welcome to the show: it’s a metal concert but there’s a disco ball furiously rotating and everyone’s just running around alternating between head-banging and the funky chicken, screaming because they didn’t sign up for this.
It starts off fairly normally, the rough chords of Bulls On Parade filling the venue and the crowd pulsating like a hoard of crumbs on a trampoline. It all goes downhill when someone screams into a microphone (or are they singing? Unsure.)
The agonisingly slow tempo means this version of the Bee Gees classic cannot and should not be sung during resuscitation, which (correct me if I’m wrong) is the main appeal of the song. The way this video is pieced together also means the very first extended “aaaaahhh” is omitted, which adds to the bewilderment you are likely to be suffering from.
In the interests of self-preservation, I had to skip about 30 seconds in the middle, so really anything could have happened. The YouTube clip conveniently cuts off before we find out if anyone claps at the end.
Experience all 3 minutes and 41 seconds of auditory torment below:
Rage Against The Machine’s upcoming Public Service Announcement tour begins this March in Texas and spans Coachella, Boston Calling and Firefly music festivals, supported by Run the Jewels. Not sure this article is the best advertisement for their future shows. Ha. Sorry.
So yeah, in summary, that sucked. Let’s all listen to Pond’s sneaky cover of Jive Talkin’ instead.