Mario or Sonic? Tackling the tough questions with Tired Lion

Following the release of their sophomore EP we took some time tackling the tough questions with Tired Lion, chatting Splendour, Russian strippers, Vance Joy’s cock and their favourite things from the 90s.

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Photos by Liam Cameron.

HAPPY: Hey guys, thanks for hanging out today. To start out we want to play a little game, and seeing as your sound is so influenced by the music of the 90’s we’ve made it 90’s themed. So I’ll give you two things from the 90’s and you have to pick one. And since Nick is still out parking the car you guys can answer for him. So first up, Nirvana or Smashing Pumpkins?

MATT: Oohhh Smashing Pumpkins 

SOPHIE: Yeah Smashing Pumpkins

MATT: (to Ethan) You Like Nirvana better.

ETHAN: Yeah.

MATT: Me and Sophie are massive Smashing Pumpkins fans.

ETHAN: That is a hard question, I’m going Nirvana and Nick’s going Nirvana.

HAPPY: Baywatch or Saved By The Bell?

MATT: Saved By The Bell.

ETHAN: Saved By The Bell.

SOPHIE: Baywatch.


SOPHIE: It’s way more fun to watch because you can just take the piss all the time.

MATT: You can do that with Saved By The Bell.

SOPHIE: That had too much drama for me, I have enough drama in my life. There was too much going on.

MATT: I remember the principal was pretty down to earth, there were dramas but he just calmed it all down.

ETHAN: I like that show.

SOPHIE: I think it made me never want to go to school.

HAPPY: Really? That was the best school ever! And you reckon Nick would go?

ETHAN: Probably Baywatch because he likes titties.

MATT: He’s also a very passionate man and they run very passionately.

SOPHIE: I actually enjoy the storylines!

HAPPY: Okay another TV show, Seinfeld or Friends?

ETHAN: Seinfeld.

MATT: Seinfeld. (To Sophie) I know where you’re gonna go.

SOPHIE: Yeah probably Friends.

MATT: Because Sophie and her sister used to watch Friends all the time. When we first became friends I used to go around her house and they’d bang on about Friends all the time. I didn’t get it. I just used to wait for The Simpsons to come on.

ETHAN: Nick’s Seinfeld as well, he loves that show.

HAPPY: Another TV, Simpsons or Rugrats?

All: Oooohhhhhhh!

SOPHIE: Rugrats! I’ve been watching Rugrats lately, that’s my go-to before bed.

ETHAN: See, what Simpsons season? 1-12?

MATT: Nah you have to do 3-12. Simpsons 1-12, they personified a generation.

ETHAN: I reckon I watched more Rugrats before and then I got more into Simpsons. Nick is Simpsons too.

HAPPY: Okay cool. Gameboy or Tamagotchi?

SOPHIE: Gameboy.

MATT: Gameboy.

ETHAN: Yeah Gameboy.

SOPHIE: I had a purple, transparent Gameboy Colour. I did karate in Year Two, and I won it because I brought ten friends to the class to try out. So I won a free Gameboy. Initially I didn’t win so I cried and they gave the Gameboy to someone else. Then they bought another one and said “Oh sorry, we made a mistake“. So I don’t know if that was just my mum and buying it for the karate people.

ETHAN: Cool story.

MATT: Has to be Gameboy, the other one just shits and cries. Nick would go Digimon.

SOPHIE: No he wouldn’t go Digimon! He’d go Beyblades or something. What about Tazos! They were pretty good! You get them in the chips, like Samboy. Oh man how good were Samboy?

HAPPY: I feel it was because of the Tazos though…

ETHAN: Lays were pretty good.

SOPHIE: Lays were shit, they had nothing. Your Italian mum only bought you those.

MATT: I think we’re only three down the list for this quick game.

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HAPPY: Okay, overalls or Flanno?

MATT and ETHAN: Flanno.

SOPHIE: Overalls. I used to wear overalls all the time. I used to ask mum where she got them from and she said they fell off the back of a truck, so I used to think they literally came off the truck, but they were just stolen. I had that, a white t-short and a best friend necklace.

HAPPY: Nice, that’s a dope look! Okay, Titanic or Toy Story?

ETHAN: Toy Story.

MATT: Toy Story.

SOPHIE: Ahhhh I’m a sucker for both!

MATT: I used to like Titanic because when it came out it was in 1995 I think, I remember there was a sex scene. It was hell fucking naughty. It was an M movie and I wasn’t allowed to watch M movies by myself. But Toy Story was pretty sick.

ETHAN: I’m gonna lock in Toy Story.

SOPHIE: I’m gonna lock in Titanic. I’m a sucker for the epic love story.

HAPPY: It’s more than just a steamy sex scene for you.

SOPHIE: For me, as a young girl, the sex scene wasn’t everything.

MATT: Yeah, I used to love sex as a child.

ETHAN: And then it got ruined for you? (laughs).

HAPPY: (Laughs) Alright, Mario or Sonic?

MATT: Mario.

ETHAN: I’m gonna go Sonic, the storyline in Mario got way monotonous for me.

SOPHIE: I was brought up with Mario. My cousin was a huge fan, and I think we were the only ones on our street who had a Super Nintendo, and he had the scope attachment as well.

ETHAN: We had both, but I also had Alex the Kid which was the equivalent of Mario and I liked that better.

MATT: Is that the one where you turn the Sega on without anything in it?  

ETHAN: What? No, you had to buy a cartridge.

SOPHIE: (laughs) And then a magical game appears!

MATT: No, I had one before the Mega Drive, we had the master system, and when you turned it on Alex the Kid came with no cartridge. It holds a special place, but Mario man.

ETHAN: Oh man Knuckles, man he was a badass.

MATT: Tails was a bit of a bitch.

SOPHIE: What was your pick?

HAPPY: I’d go Sonic, all the way!

MATT: I’d reckon Nick would go Sonic…

ETHAN: Because he looks a bit like a hedgehog (laughs).

HAPPY: Alright last question…Harry Potter or Goosebumps?

MATT: Goosebumps.

ETHAN: Goosebumps.

SOPHIE: Yeah, Goosebumps.

MATT: Don’t you dare say Harry Potter!

SOPHIE: I didn’t!

MATT: I brought two Goosebumps books on tour.

HAPPY: Really? Which ones?

MATT: Monster Blood part 2 and the sand one.

ETHAN: Oh yeah!

SOPHIE: I remember in silent reading that’s what everyone would read.

ETHAN: Remember the pick your own story ones? That was the next level!

Tired Lion interview perth scene

Nick arrives at the interview.

ETHAN: Oh hey Nick, would you go Mario or Sonic?

NICK: Sonic.

ETHAN: Can we just do a speed round for Nick? I want to see if we got your answers right.

HAPPY: Okay, Nirvana or Smashing Pumpkins?

NICK: Nirvana

HAPPY: Baywatch or Saved By The Bell?

NICK: Saved By The Bell.

HAPPY: Seinfeld or Friends?

NICK: Seinfeld.

HAPPY: Simpsons or Rugrats?

NICK: Simpsons.

HAPPY: Gameboy or Tamagotchi?

NICK: Gameboy (laughs). Did anyone answer Tamagotchi?

MATT: I said Digimon.

HAPPY: Overalls or Flanno?

NICK: Flanno.

HAPPY: Titanic or Toy Story?

NICK: Toy Story

HAPPY: Harry Potter or Goosebumps?

NICK: Goosebumps.

MATT: So we got one wrong.

ETHAN: We said you’d like Baywatch for the titties.

NICK: That’s also why I watch Saved By The Bell. (laughs).

ETHAN: Didn’t Screech have  sex tape?

MATT: He did!

HAPPY: What?

ETHAN: He tried to get famous again and it didn’t work.

HAPPY: Well thanks for playing the game guys. That was pretty cool, and speaking of cool things you guys are opening Splendour! What’s the feeling like?

SOPHIE: I said my heart was beating so fast because I was so excited. It’s a bit weird because it’s always been something we want to do. I remember going to Southbound with Matt, and we were like “The day we get to play at a major festival will be a big deal!“, so we’re pretty stoked.

HAPPY: Do you have something special planned? 

SOPHIE: I think Matt has something special planned with some strapping ladies. Because remember he was interested in sex from a young age.

ETHAN: Not anymore, because it was ruined for him!

MATT: There’s a girl who’s going, and she’s really beautiful and she’s really nice, and…

SOPHIE: Oh jeez, I know I’m beautiful, thanks!

MATT: No this isn’t Sophie. I’m gonna go hang out with her, if she’ll let me.

ETHAN: (laughs) If she’ll let you?

MATT: If she lets me stand by her (laughs).

ETHAN: Well I’m pretty excited, it’s gonna be sick! I don’t like to make to plans and just see what comes.

NICK: I’m excited to see the other bands as well, Catfish and the Bottlemen aren’t playing but DZ Deathrays are so I’m really excited for that!

SOPHIE: We’re tenting, and I love camping. Which is better than what we’re doing now as we’re crashing on people’s couches on this tour. Every city we’re like, “Oh hey, can we crash on your couch?” I think Matt just gets Tinder and just changes the city to whatever place we’re going to (laughs).

ETHAN: Isn’t there a ‘guitarists on tour’ kind of site?

MATT: Fuck you!

ETHAN: No I mean that’s something people do!

SOPHIE: There are people we know in bands that have done that. It’d be a good way to sell out shows I reckon.

Tired Lion interview

HAPPY: It’s happened before, we did an article where artists have profiles and if you match with them you get a free download of their song. 

ETHAN: It’s all coming together in one sexy combo.

MATT: Yeah, Tired Tinder.

ETHAN: That was shit.

SOPHIE: I have a massive hate for Tinder. You want to meet the boy of your dreams, and they want to meet the girl of their dreams…

NICK: That’s not what you use Tinder for.

ETHAN: You’ve got it all wrong!

SOPHIE: I know you go on there to fuck, but if you did end up liking them you’d be like “Eeeuugh“. You know what I mean? What if you hit it off?

ETHAN: Move with the times man, Rugrats aren’t coming back. 

MATT: I don’t like Tinder either. I’m the only single one in the band and I logged on the other day and my last match was at the end of 2014. And she wouldn’t talk to me anymore.

SOPHIE: Because she found out you weren’t actually Vance Joy. Matt gets that a lot.

HAPPY: Do you really?

MATT: It’s the curly hair.

SOPHIE: And the boyish charms.

ETHAN: And the massive cock.

NICK: Are you sure he has a massive cock?

MATT: He’s called Joy for a reason.

ETHAN: What was the question? Splendour? (laughs).

HAPPY: Who cares anymore? (laughs). Well moving on, we featured you guys on a list about awesome Perth rock bands. Is there something in the water, what secret are you keeping?

ETHAN: I haven’t tested the water, is there something in it?

MATT:  Well it’s hard because I’m from Perth, but a little observation I’ve made since coming over here is that Perth has, or it did, have a lot more smaller venues. Down in Freo especially there were a lot of smaller rooms. If you’re just kicking off as an 18 year old you can play shows without selling tickets. So there’s a good practice ground. There are booking agents who will book at a local level. Over here it’s a lot bigger, but the starting out bands get nurtured a little bit more. I was thinking about that in the car the other day, I think one of your blogs said something about something in the water, and I read that and maybe that might be it. Then again I’ve never lived anywhere else.

NICK: I think also because it’s quite isolated, a lot of bands really try to hone their craft a lot more before bothering to head east for tours. Here it’s easier to drive down to Melbourne, it’s a lot cheaper. I’m not saying their quality is cheaper! But there’s something in that.

MATT: We were jamming in a garage for years, just as friends….

SOPHIE: Now we’re not friends anymore (laughs).

MATT: Yeah it’s strictly business! 

ETHAN: It’s all for the money now! But I think the isolation over there, friendship groups are a lot smaller. So friends will show you records and and that’s all you’d listen to. So I think that’s why the rock genre is so strong.

SOPHIE: It’s the incestuous, big pool.

MATT: Everyone plays in each other bands! There’s just three musicians in Perth who make up about 400 bands.

ETHAN: I think because it’s so small, and without pigeon holing it, it does happen by accident. You’re just around the people who make the same music.

SOPHIE: Would you say that was great?

ETHAN: I would say it’s fucking fantastic.

MATT: But it’s a hard point because being from Perth we’re exposed to the local scene. All my favourite bands on a smaller level are from Perth, but since we’ve started touring there are a lot of Melbourne and Sydney bands who are fucking great as well. it might not be a Perth thing, it’s just coz we’re far away. We’re those freaks from another country.

SOPHIE: Maybe it’s just easier in Perth to see the standout acts. I know here there are so many acts. Everyone comes over here because it’s the pinnacle and it’s where it’s all gonna happen, where labels see you, so maybe it could be that as well. It’s easier to pinpoint the strong acts coz there’s less pressure I guess.

ETHAN: It’s pretty relaxed too. We don’t feel the need to come over here and ‘make it’, there’s ten venues in Perth and you know eventually you’ll play them. It’s more about music and honing that craft.

HAPPY: So it’s more of a community thing.

ALL: Yeah!

SOPHIE: Well even with the WAM awards as well, they really nurture the WA music. I think that’s really cool, to have our own state’s music awards.

MATT: That musical body, they’re really fucking good and dedicated. They came to a strip club in Singapore with us once, that’s how dedicated they are.  

SOPHIE: It was called Four Floors of Whores.

MATT: That’s literally what it was (laughs).

HAPPY: (laughs)Why were you there? 

SOPHIE: I was testing the waters on becoming a whore so I took the band there (laughs) not really! We played a couple of showcase shows over there, and WAM came over and they were really supportive.

ETHAN: It was their idea actually.

NICK: Yeah! It was totally their idea to go.

MATT: It used to be a department store, and all the shops are strip clubs and brothels.

ETHAN: And the first floor is ugly, and then it gets better as you go up.

SOPHIE: What floor were we on?

ETHAN: The second.  

SOPHIE: They had a really awesome cover band though.

MATT: I had a Russian prostitute run her hands through my hair in the bathroom.

SOPHIE: Really? In that place? (laughs) Russian one, I think you’re making that up!

HAPPY: Did she think you were Vance Joy?

MATT: Yeah, she thought I was Vance Sojpahloncheck!  

SOPHIE: (laughs) What about the albino Vance Joy?

HAPPY: Did you see an albino Vance Joy today?

The whole band breaks out in hysterics.

SOPHIE: We were running really late for the plane today, we nearly missed it. Matt decided to blame it on someone else. And he’s like “Look at that Albino Vance Joy up there, he’s holding us up!“, he had a masive sack and guitar. And he had straight hair….

MATT: No he had hair like mine…

ETHAN: (laughs) No he didn’t! He had long hair! He had dreadies! And he had a small dick as well.

HAPPY: Well on that note, I’ll ask our last question. We always talk about what makes us happy, so what makes you happy?

ETHAN: Not a lot. (laughs).

SOPHIE: Obviously music makes us happy. Talking about Vance Joy makes us happy. Lately my thing is collecting vintage lamps from op shops. If I’m feeling sad I’ll go out and get a lamp. I have 12 so far.

MATT: What makes you happy Nick?

NICK: Dragonball Z! There’s a new series, and a new movie and that’s pretty awesome. 

MATT: Whenever he’s grumpy I know what to put on. Nothing makes me happy.

SOPHIE: Gameboys dude. 

MATT: That makes me happy.

SOPHIE: Drinking.

MATT: Yep.


ETHAN: Nah Matt doesn’t like that anymore.

MATT: Yeah it fills me with dread.

ETHAN: I don’t know…

SOPHIE: My dog!

ETHAN: Yeah animals make me happy! I find a lot of videos on Youtube of baby goat videos.

HAPPY: The one where they do back flips?

ETHAN: Dude that one’s nuts, but I was watching one where they were sneezing! I want to get a Savannah cat, that’ll make me happy. They’re pretty big. They’re the size of a dog but they’re a domestic cat and five grand. We need to write a good song, and then get money…

SOPHIE: And then we can write a record with that money and we can get those cats.

ETHAN: That’d be sick!

SOPHIE: I don’t want one!

NICK: I’ll take yours so I can have two.

SOPHIE: Fine I’ll keep the money and buy my dog a cool bone.

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Check out our feature on the origins of the Mario theme song too!