Unsolicited dick pics have sky-rocketed since the dawn of Snapchat. So, before you take that penis selfie, here’s what sex experts advise.
Picture this – you wake up in a stupor, still groggy from a shitty night’s sleep. You reach for your phone. It lights up with an all-too-familiar Snapchat notification bubble. You click on it, absent-mindedly and OH MY GOD IT’S A DICK PIC.
You rub the sleep out of your eyes and blink. To your horror, it’s STILL THERE. Oh God, there’s a raging hard on splayed across your screen. A dick pic selfie that you most certainly didn’t ask for. And in high-definition, nonetheless.
Sound familiar? Sorry, hun. Many of us have received those late-night unrequested big dick pictures and it can be confronting. Let’s face it, dickpics have been around since cameras have existed. But the advent of Snapchat in 2011 certainly caused a spike in unsolicited confrontations with male genitalia. The bigger Snapchat got the bigger penis picture got.
Of course, we’re not here to shame penis pics. We acknowledge that many consenting individuals have reveled in the beauty of a snapchat dick pic they’ve received. I mean, fuck, there’s even an 8000 dick pics book by Elly Delsson, with a myriad of five-star reviews on Amazon. So it’s safe to assume that as long as Snapchat exists, the Snapchat dick pics will also continue to exist.
On the flip side, however, many unsuspecting victims of dick pic porn have been left scarred by the shocking display of an average dick pic on their screens. Unsurprisingly, “do girls like dick pics?” is a commonly-searched question on Google. We figure that’s not a bad thing, though. At least there are people out there who pause to ponder before sending dik pics around.
That brings us to the point of this article – to send, or not to send? that is the first question. Now, obviously, if the person you’re planning on sending it to quite literally says show me a picture of a penis then you’re good to go on dick pics to send to them. The second question is, how do you take a dic k pic that your pending recipient would actually want to see? One nice dick pic that is truly a work of art. With thousands of dicks pics flying around the digital sphere on a day-to-day basis, how do you take one that truly stands out? (no pun intended).
Well, if you’ve ever been curious about such things as how to take a good dick pic or how to make your dick look bigger or what is a dick or how to show your dick without scaring people, we’ve got you covered. We’ve scoured the web on your behalf and rounded up some of the best advice that sex experts have to offer on taking a dick poc and how to post your penis picture consensually. Without further ado, here is the best dick pics advice we could get our hands on, so you can learn how to take good dick pics for that special someone.
#1 – Consent is key
This one goes without saying. In order to avoid the shock-horror scenario depicted at the beginning of this write-up, give your recipient a heads up before you send a dick.pic their way. Think of it like this, would you randomly show a bigdick pic to a passer-by on the street with no prior convo? Fuck no! Same goes with penis nudes online.
Hell, you might think you have a really nice dick, and the whole world would be thrilled to see it, but in actuality, that’s not the case. Unless you get the green light, cock pics are a no-go. Licensed sex therapist, Vanessa Marin tells Women’s Health, “receiving an unwanted dick pic feels really awful, even violating.”
So, what’s the best way to go about the whole consent situation? Vanessa advises being straight-up honest and asking if they’re “DTR (down to receive).” Adding a further suggestion, she says,“if she’s into sending one of herself, ask her if you can return the favor.”
With asking for consent being such a simple concept, why do so many penis-havers jump the gun? Dr Cory Pedersen from Canada’s Kwantlen Polytechnic University reckons it has something to do with “transactional mindset.” She tells VICE, “men send these images with the hope that they’ll receive a similar one – a nude – in return.”
Well, there you have it. If you’re out there sending unsolicited d pics with the expectation of receiving pretty womens pics in return, back up and send a dick poc the right way, so that your dixk pic isn’t received the wrong way.
#2 – Timing is everything
Okay, so let’s say you get the green light for sending pictures of dick. For the best chance of receiving a positive reaction, you want to ensure that you’re sending this divk pic at a time that is convenient and appropriate for the recipient.
To state the obvious, you can start by asking if now is a good time for a hard on pic to be sent. The last thing you want to do is catch them off-guard with dick pic porn while they’re at work, or visiting their parents for dinner.
Additionally, you can ease into sending the pic with some light conversation and flirting. Think of free dick pics like foreplay before sex. Warm-ups are often crucial for setting the right mood, and achieving a happy ending for all parties involved.
“A nude picture is definitely more intense than just chatting back and forth about sexy things,” says Vanessa Marin. “If you jump to that extreme too quickly, it can be super jarring and not actually erotic.”
As advised in Women’sHealth, “Save the dick pic for evenings and weekends, when she’s more likely to be alone.” They also write, “bonus points if you time it for when she’s relaxed and more in her body than her head, like right after a shower or while she’s nursing a glass of wine.”
Finally, many sources recommend being fully erect when you take a penis pick for that special someone. Of course, this is not a ‘hard-and-fast’ rule (see what we did there?). There’s nothing unethical about a flaccid penis pic. But, if the purpose behind your sexting is to try and entice the receiver into having sex with you, pictures of erect penis will help show them what you’re really working with…that’s how to send a sexy pic that will really get their imagination running wild!
#3 – Set the stage
While the focal point of a dick pic will obviously be the dick, the state of your surroundings can also be just as important. So, before you send dick pics without a second thought, scan the room real quick. Is the dirty underwear you tossed in the corner of your bedroom appearing in the camera frame? Do your bedsheets have some questionable stains on them? According to seasoned travellers in the big dic pic sending and receiving game, shit like this can be an absolute mood kill.
Earlier this year, Cosmopolitan asked 30 women to explain what they’d like to see in a dick pic and here’s what Faith, 26, had to say: “A hard dick + a backdrop that doesn’t include your toilet, a sink, or a dirty floor.”
Maddie, 21, adds: “Please don’t put your face in the photo or include your dirty room in the background. I’d just rather see their bodies.”
So there you go, gents. If you’re trying to impress the ladies with hot dick pics you might wanna clean up a bit first. Especially if the backdrop of your penis pic looks like your bedroom was hit by a hurricane!
#4 – Find out what they actually like
Everyone’s into something a little different, but one thing that’s universally attractive is effort. Putting in the time to have a conversation and find out what really gets the recipient going can only work in your favour!
Truth be told, anyone interested in seeing dick picks can Google one onto their screen in a matter of seconds. The internet has no shortage of free dick pics for your viewing pleasure – big dick pics or small penis pic or uncircumcised penis pic or white dick pic or funny dick pic or girl with dick or black dic pic or big white dick pic or whatever floats your boat! So, how do you take one that has rare, avant-garde qualities? And caters to the specific desires of you recipient?? Well, ask and you shall hopefully receive the answers that will guide you in your penis photography journey!
According to Sofiya Alexandra, co-host of the podcast Private Parts Unknown, “Like a quote, a dick pic needs context.” She tells Men’sHealth, “Show me abs, torso, and a peek at that butt. This can also help give context to how big your dick actually is. You may think it’s better to make your dick look humungous, but if you do that, and your dick is average, or even on the smaller side, they might feel like you misrepresented the truth.”
She adds, “BTW, there’s nothing wrong with having a penis on the smaller side—it’s just that no one appreciates false advertising!”
#5 – Lights, camera, action!
Don’t underestimate the power of lighting, location and lust, baby! We mentioned the important concept of foreplay before sex earlier. Well, the same applies for cyber sex! Setting the mood via the atmosphere surrounding your penis portrait can make all the difference!
Let’s make one thing very clear – flash photography and penises are not an ideal pairing! Regular dicks pic recipients say, opt for natural or warm lighting, and strike the right balance between your dick being up-close enough, but not taking up the entire frame with your bigdick pic show.
Lauren, 26, tells Cosmopolitan, “I only enjoy a good dick pic if I’m already in the ~mood~. The penis should be the focus, but it doesn’t need to be the entire picture. Experiment with angles rather than distance and cut it out with the flash. Warm lighting is always more flattering, so go stand by a lamp or something.”
Adding another perspective, Taylor, 28, says, “I have received two truly transformative dick pics in my life. The first was a gorgeous, well-framed black and white shot, and the other was a video with his underwear on, gently rubbing it. The key for me is effort and as a bonus, leaving something up to the imagination is super hot.”
In a world of mainstream cock porn, dare to be different. For example, you might want to experiment with sending a black and white dick pic to make it seem a little classier, or artsier, if you will. Don’t be afraid to make that dick pic black and white with a cool filter! If you’re trying keep the mood sexy though, we suggest you avoid being a goofball by putting a weird Snapchat filter on it that makes your dick look like it’s dancing around in a clown costume, or wearing a leprechaun hat…unless you’re trying to make your dick pic funny on purpose, of course.
We hope you find this list helpful! Here’s the bottom line: In the era of Snapchat, and Instagram messages that disappear after one play, people can get a little too….cocky, so to speak. We’re not here to dick shame, though. Sexting pics of dicks is as natural as anything else these days.
But as a general guide, here’s the CliffsNotes version of everything we’ve talked about: ask for consent, make sure the timing’s right, take pride in your space as much as your dick pik, have fun, get creative and keep your wits about you…unless you want your boss finding pictures of your cock on the internet. Happy snapping!
